A potential change.

We'll see how it goes. I don't know. I think a clean slate would be nice. Looking back on some of my entries here along with my horribly angsty teen username I need a new start. This whole trip to London made me just want to throw everything away (although respecting where I've come from and what has made me the person I am) and revamp a lot of things in my life. In the past 6 months I've become more at home with myself, more content with who I am, happy to be alive and a somewhat more pleasant person. Maybe that's an exaggeration. I just feel like I've grown a lot in general.

That sounds stupid and insincere. The point is life is beautiful and horrible all at the same time and I've grown to be alright with the world and myself and so this is my clean slate: http://mysteryspoon.blogspot.com/

Thanks for the name Becky and Monty, even if you were at the wrong airport.

Duh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh duh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh BATMAN

So the other night I was laying in bed trying to sleep. It was 1:30 am and I had to be up in 5 hours. I had my hand somewhere near or on the side of my head? Anyway, I felt one of my dreads move across my hand/neck/face and heard chirping/squeaking. I moved my hand and heard the chirping make its way to the floor. I thought I had a really big noisy beetle or bug or something on my head. I turned on my TV for light and there was a fucking BAT on my floor. I had a bat on my fucking head at 1:30 am.


Something I wrote for a class last semester

The ancient maple outside of rolled glass windows writhed in the scorching midday breeze. Today was particularly hot, but the maple sacrificed itself to shade the vibrant green turf below. Ice cream cones, Frisbee and picnic ants constructed the afternoon under the rustling foliage. Dry rotted and smooth, a tire was hung from a limb by thick and twisted old sailor's rope and swayed in the breeze. My siblings and I sustained grass stains, skinned knees and a strong bond underneath the behemoth relic on the lazy summer days of our childhood. Approximately seven feet up the mammoth trunk the tree split into a jungle gym. Seedlings nestled in the separation, we affectionately called them helicopters. The memories built around this tree would last a lifetime.
Sadly the tree, being so close to our quaint little white house, had to come down. Roots ate their way into the earth surrounding our home and wrapped themselves like pythons around the septic system and had the potential of war machines; they were strong enough to punch through the foundations of our home and crumble it to its knees. My sister protested the decision, but it wasn't a democracy. This was totalitarian, nobody had any say. The maple had stood long enough and needed to be stopped before it wreaked havoc on the homestead. None of us could stop the blades from shredding apart the fibrous stalk, the chains from snaking around the upper limbs to pull it away from the house. What once seemed so powerful now lay across the green reaches of the yard like Goliath felled to his knees by David.


Comment and I'll list 7 interests from your profile in a reply. Then you do an entry about what they mean and why you are interested in them.

Body Modification: It all started at about age 13, I started to have an interest in piercings. My first piercing was age 15, my labret. It was off centered and I only just recently had it redone. Since that labret piercing I've gotten a tattoo, my ears, my eyebrow, labret redone and a microdermal implant. I have 4 more tattoos planned and two more microdermals to get. For some reason I just find it so intriguing and I love the adrenaline. It's also gotten me used to needles where I used to get light headed at the thought of them, this will allow me to give plasma at some point.

Dancing like nobody is watching: I just don't see a reason to not do this. I go to concerts, I dance like an idiot. It's just how shit goes really. I don't care if I look stupid and I'm not worried about people judging me, I am who I am and they can piss off if they want to give me shit for it. So it's more than just dancing, it's confidence and it's a way for me to express it.

Dreadlocks: They're on my head. If I didn't have an interest in them I probably wouldn't have them on my head. Again, I've wanted dreadlocks since about age 12 or 13 and only recently went through with it. For the longest time I just liked having my hair long, flowing, soft and touchable. Now that I've finally gone through with dreads I know it'll be a good choice. I feel like a dirty hippie, however.

Incense: It started as a way to cover a certain smell. Now I just love the memories, the emotions, the ideas and the relaxation its scent brings. There have been many good times had while a stick has been burning and scent is the strongest sense tied to memory, it just brings me back to places and times. It's still a good way to cover certain smells though, yeah?

Organic food: This came from me becoming vegan and then vegetarian. I am back to eating some meat, but still find the preservatives, the chemicals, bi-products and excessive CRAP put into our food disturbing. I'd rather eat corn than a science experiment in genetics. I feel healthier and more limber when I eat organic for a while and it's become a lifestyle that I can't keep up due to costs, but it's still something I think needs to be invested in by our government and private companies.

Rats: I always wanted a rat. I got one around age 12 and his name was Potat. He lived about 3 years, and I cried for 3 days when he finally went. Ever since rats have been my pet of choice, they have fantastic personalities and are clever. They tend to behave like cats.

Sunrise: Without it where are our days? I much prefer sunrise to sunset. Sunrise has a certain air about it. The dew on the leaves and the shimmer in the air is a completely different experience to that of a sunset. The world is entering its waking life and things seem so fresh and new. I just wish I could feel like the sunrise everyday without the responsibilities that come with it. Lazy Sunday mornings on the grass watching the sun peer over the horizon and going back into the house to cook breakfast... Some of my favorite days involve the sunrise.


I just made a fine ebay purchase:

Yeah it's a bit rusty, it's kind of rough right now. I think with a bit of cleaning up and some paint it'll be a mighty fine ride. It's an antique Murray. I don't know if anybody else remembers that brand, but I sure do. I had an excellent bike from them back in the 90s

You're a liar, get the fuck out.

Get out of my fucking head. Just, for the love of god, stay out of my fucking head because I've been thinking about you constantly for three months, fucking three months and I can't get you out of my damn skull to save my life and it's driving me into the ground and I'm so damn depressed and you're getting your payback, you've more than equalled it. Just get the fuck out of my head. Please. Please. Just leave my mind for good so I can move on because I can't fucking do it like you, you're ruining me. I'm ruining me. It's all on my fucking lap and I fucking ruined myself, but you had a hand because you didn't wait for me like you said you would, like I thought you would... You didn't give me enough time to figure myself out and to figure out where I wanted to go and what I wanted to happen with my life. That's not something that can be solved in a couple months. I couldn't do it with you I had to do it on my own, I had to leave, but I was prepared to come back, I always wanted to come back. I thought you would wait. I thought you would fucking wait but you didn't, you said you wouldn't get over me, but you did. You lied to me, but I guess I lied to you too because I said I wouldn't come back.


I have this electric guitar. It's old, I'd say 50s or 60s. It's gorgeous, it's one of the more attractive electrics I have seen. The only problem is the neck is warped to shit and the electronics don't work. Not much of a guitar, right?

Today I made a decision about it - I'll be rebuilding it. The first thing I think I will be doing is buying an entirely new neck rather than thinking it can be repaired. The current one, besides being warped, is relatively unimpressive and clunky, it's a generic guitar that looks like it was mimicking an early Strat and has no name. The necks I'm looking at don't have the Strat look to them (save for two of them but they are vintage necks from the 60s so I can have a more original look).

After I get a new neck I'll be taking the hardware apart. I'm going to rebuild the bridge (it's a little dirty and age has gotten the best of it) and rewire the electronics with all new hardware unless the pickups can be salvaged, I may opt to keep those for the vintage sound... Unless they totally blow ass. Regardless I'll be rewiring the electronics to a more versatile setup, slightly modified from anything standard, and potentially I'll install a preamp for a little extra kick.

It'll be a nice little project and it will give me a reason to get off of acoustic for a bit and work at face melting.
  • Current Music

I met a crazy!

Alright, here's the deal.

I was on a hill at a stop light and there's this guy in a black trail blazer behind me, about a foot from my rear end (I drive stick, I'm on a hill. Keep that in mind.) Anyway, my car has been acting up lately, it started to sputter and such, so when the light turned green I didn't have quite the normal power -- point being I rolled back maybe 6 inches because it didn't have the pick up I needed.

Anyway, this guy behind me now honks three times (he shouldn't have been that fucking close, dumb ass) and gets right on my ass. ROOOAD RAAAAGE! So anyway he starts tail gating me up the hill and by this time I'm going a little over 30ish in a 25 zone. Still on my ass. So anyway, I put my blinker on, hit my brakes and turn onto the side road, which I had to hit the curb of because he would have rear ended me had I not, where there's a parking garage, pull into there and park, lock all my doors. Somewhere in there I flipped him off because he wouldn't back off. Anyway, he pulls in, parks next to me and gets out.

This is the fun part. He knocks on my window while yelling, "You got a fucking problem?". He repeats this over and over. He's bitching for about 5 minutes, during which he says "I drove stick for 30 fucking years and I never had a fucking problem," (had nothing to do with the transmission, it was my engine sputtering out.) So keep in mind now this guys has to be at least 45, he says, "You were man enough to give me the finger, why not man the fuck up and get the fuck out of the car" (or something to that effect). Anyway, he starts to walk away and then he turns around and looks me in the eye over the front of my car, yells at me "YOU GOT A FUCKING PROBLEM?" then walks back over to my window and says "Fuck you, you greasy bastard."

Now, he pulls out. I told Sarah to get his plate number when he drove out. Smart little prick he was, he noticed our glance of "We are getting your plate you dick", and backed all the way out so we couldn't get his plate number.